Our world will be erased/our kin will be immaculate ejaculate in space

I'm guessing that an absence of reports from the eastern hemisphere of Christians spontaneously ascending into the sky or vanishing outright means that Harold Camping's prediction of the Rapture failed.  It's possible that we just might not have noticed because there are so few True Believers in the world.  We can't truly say they were wrong until the world doesn't end in October.

It's not like this is the first time, after all.

Of course, the mainstream Christians out there are rolling their eyes and quoting Chapter 24, Line 36 of my biblical namesake.  Obviously we'll never know when Christians are going to spontaneously ascend into the sky or vanish outright until the day it happens.  It definitely wasn't supposed to have happened already (hint: don't read the two lines immediately preceding line 36), which means it's going to happen any day now.